ANOTHER YEAR..........

AS ANOTHER YEAR MOVES INTO THE PAST........SWEET AND BITTER MEMORIES OF THOSE I HAVE LOST FLOW WITH IT..........




In my life.....I love your more, and I miss you so........

WATCHING THE CHAOS

The Eye of God....courtesy of NASA

THE TRUTH ABOUT LOVE..................

O Tell Me The Truth About Love

Some say love's a little boy,
And some say it's a bird,
Some say it makes the world go around,
Some say that's absurd,
And when I asked the man next-door,
Who looked as if he knew,
His wife got very cross indeed,
And said it wouldn't do.

Does it look like a pair of pyjamas,
Or the ham in a temperance hotel?
Does its odour remind one of llamas,
Or has it a comforting smell?
Is it prickly to touch as a hedge is,
Or soft as eiderdown fluff?
Is it sharp or quite smooth at the edges?
O tell me the truth about love.

Our history books refer to it
In cryptic little notes,
It's quite a common topic on
The Transatlantic boats;
I've found the subject mentioned in
Accounts of suicides,
And even seen it scribbled on
The backs of railway guides.

Does it howl like a hungry Alsatian,
Or boom like a military band?
Could one give a first-rate imitation
On a saw or a Steinway Grand?
Is its singing at parties a riot?
Does it only like Classical stuff?
Will it stop when one wants to be quiet?
O tell me the truth about love.

I looked inside the summer-house;
It wasn't over there;
I tried the Thames at Maidenhead,
And Brighton's bracing air.
I don't know what the blackbird sang,
Or what the tulip said;
But it wasn't in the chicken-run,
Or underneath the bed.

Can it pull extraordinary faces?
Is it usually sick on a swing?
Does it spend all its time at the races,
or fiddling with pieces of string?
Has it views of its own about money?
Does it think Patriotism enough?
Are its stories vulgar but funny?
O tell me the truth about love.

When it comes, will it come without warning
Just as I'm picking my nose?
Will it knock on my door in the morning,
Or tread in the bus on my toes?
Will it come like a change in the weather?
Will its greeting be courteous or rough?
Will it alter my life altogether?
O tell me the truth about love.

WH Auden

DECLUTTERING # 2

2) WRITE IT DOWN

"If you have a bunch of things on your mind, get them on paper and off your mind."

Journaling puts you in touch with yourself. I remember many years ago when I was first advised to journal. I was told write down how I feel. "I don't know how I feel" I replied. I was so lost and so far away from myself at that time. So my mentor told me to write down my physical feelings each day. That tightness in my shoulders, those nerves in my stomach, the headaches, etc. etc. etc. and in time she explained, I would excavate through the physical to the emotional. The very act of taking a pen in hand and writing on paper is cleansing. Write it down and begin the process of letting go, making space for the blessings and gratitude waiting for me in each day. Write it down, open the door, and let the light in........

SUCCESS SORT OF....

After some time spent emptying my mind, today I decided it was time to focus......in a different way. I am learning how to operate my new Nikon SLR. My last camera was a Nikon 8080, a long way away from digital imaging. So, the learning curve, for me, is steep. After fiddling for the past two weeks with menus, buttons, instruction manuals that require a PhD. to decipher, a modicum of success this afternoon.

I saw the bee, the bee saw me.....I managed to focus and voila......my first successful shot. Oh joy....onward into the digital universe of Adobe, Light Shop, lenses, cards, flash slaves, etc. etc. etc. A new world awaits, this old dog!

DECLUTTERING # 1

Maybe I should begin my decluttering with my mind. I am not having much success in letting go of my "stuff". I am too steeped in the George Carlin definition of "My Stuff".

So by happenstance (or not?), Dr. Mercola an internet health guru emailed me this info in the last week or so:

" You may have read articles about decluttering your home or your desk."
I have read many articles and even purchased a few books on the subject, now part of the clutter!
Back to Dr. M. "but if anything needs decluttering, it's your mind." Okay let's begin there!

1) "BREATHE:
Take a few deep breaths, and then just focus on your breathing for a few minutes. It has a calming effect, and allows other thoughts just to float by."

I have never maintained a great effort meditating. Oh, I have attempted it over the years but always stopped. This week, I shall practice changing one thing and take a few minutes each day to simply BREATHE.........

There are 10 suggestions in all, who knows where I will end up!

Dr. M. suggests: "You can sort through your mind, even getting past the scar tissue of old hurts and traumas with these simple suggestions." Stay tuned........

Bertrand Russell, wrote in his autobiography in 1967:

"There is a possibility in human minds of something mysterious as night wind, deep as the sea, calm as the stars, and as strong as death, a mystic contemplation … Those who have known it cannot believe in wars any longer … if I could give to others what has come to me in this way, I could make them too feel the futility of fighting. But I do not know how to communicate it" …

I was a charter member of Bertrand Russell's Peace Movement in the mid-sixties. Many of my views have changed over the years, but that "something mysterious as the night wind, deep as the sea, calm as the stars and as strong a death", that mystic contemplation, still rests peacefully in my heart; where it once marched bravely, with great hope, in the face of rejection, believing that I could "communicate it"........

ALL THE BETTER TO HEAR YOU WITH......

Well if you have to have ears....have EARS..... the desert rodent shown above has ears so big he can hear an enemy approaching him from very far away. Some thoughts came to my mind when I found his image:

1) The wonder of evolution.

2) Is he more nervous with such radar on his head?

3) Are they high maintenance? They sure look it!


Now if I had a set of ears that large just imagine all of the troubles I could listen to. Talk about a sympathetic ear! I have always been a good listener, but with those tools who knows what heights I could reach! On second thoughts, maybe my brain would reach trouble saturation point too quickly......

What's the old proverb about the grass being greener? Never mind, after giving it careful thought; I do believe I'll keep the ears I have, thank you very much..... Anyway, it would be so difficult to find earrings, don't you think?

CAN YOU SEE ME NOW?

A horse is a horse, of course, of course......
and sometimes it is a zebra!

AMAZEMENT NEVER CEASES

The above image is of a Fossil Marine Diaton. Photographed through a microscope, I presume............ well I never! It looks to me like a Maltese Cross.
Wonder upon wonders, is there nothing new under the sun? It seems to me many of the symbols, patterns and designs that we create, enjoy and are surrounded with on a daily basis are reproductions of living things from a hidden world that we do not see with the naked eye. Makes one wonder in awe at it all. No?
Oh how I adore this wonderful life!

TRANSPARENT

"I can see right through you".... how many times have I said that in my life. If I had a nickel for each time I would be a rich woman today. Having been blessed with a certain extra-sensory instinct, I tend to read people very well. That being the case, I often know their next move before they do, a blessing and a curse over the years, I must say. But, I ramble, as usual.....

The butterfly above makes transparency a state of uniqueness.....feast on the beauty of the butterfly itself, while simultaneously enjoying the flower that nurtures the insect. The eyes are twice blessed.

"I can see right through you" who knew what joy that phrase could offer?

A DAY OFF WORK?????

"A Man he works from sun to sun but woman's work is never done"

A day off work...let me savor the thought and the day. I slept till 9:45 am, yes 9:45!
Now I am up showered and still in my PJ's, bliss. Now what for the rest of the day? Well I need to go to the laundromat and wash the huge down comforter which has been patiently folded and waiting to be washed and stored, since the last cold night, in preparation for this coming winter. How long ago was that cold night? Hard to remember in the current heat. I threw three extra large bath towels downstairs from the upstairs shower, I will wash them too. Stop by Walmart while the bedding is in the laundromat. Then this afternoon I will vacuum and wash the floors.... Hey where did my wonderful day off go???? Nothing changes and maintenance is work in any endeavor.............

MEMORIES

Memories of 44 years ago when the Beatles were performing in Glasgow. I had seen them a few years earlier when they were The Silver Beetles and instantly fell in love with George. We knew immediately this was a different sound and oh how we loved it! They were radical! My generation, long haired, brash, radical young lads from Liverpool of all places. Liverpool was a disenfranchised place in the 60's not quite worthy of being part of England in many eyes.....but then the Beatles blew that notion out of the water. We Scots understood that concept; we were a Scots when we lost and Brits when w e won......same with Liverpool, back then anyway. But back to the Beatles; adults hated them, a bad influence and all of that, twisting the minds of an entire generation, they said. Now they are members of the British Empire, knighted by the Queen. Boy, times change.
I digress from the lost interview......I can't wait to see it and be transported back to a time when a Beatles LP was the most important thing in my world. When young Liverpudlian men were very popular when I was holidaying on the Isle of Mann. When the world was young, and life was full of fun, and the Beatles wrote the score. What could be better?

HOPE.....

ACCIDENTAL FUNGUS LEADS TO PROMISING CANCER DRUG.

  An interesting fungus may in time offer hope to thousands, even millions, stricken with various cancers. I can only pray its promises come to pass.......too late for those I have loved and lost, but in time for many others.

What a blissful celebration that will be!

Jeannie

LESS IS MORE

I admit it, I am an overdoer. I work too hard for too long, eat too much, feel the need to over do it most of the time. I am heavy handed in drawing, heavy handed in adding spices to food, I am impulsive, etc. etc. etc.
I know not from whence this trait comes, but come it did and I have lived with it all of my life. Perhaps, being the daughter of an alcoholic has bent me toward excess; if at least using a different mode from my Da. Perhaps my Celtic roots give me both the predestination and the tenacity to endure, perhaps even embrace overdoing (this is a theory presented by my dear son). But I do know in my overdoing there lies a comfort of sorts, especially in physical tiredness. When I feel physically spent, I feel no pain but the physical kind; in the knees, the back etc. Maybe, just maybe, burying emotions takes a lot of physical work. And there are emotions to be submerged right now.
But then, that has been my story for as long as I can remember. Healthy? No, but ach, dinna fret, it has become a way of life.............maybe one day, when I am totally worn out, the need to bury the pain will pass, but for now................onward

IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE

The beauty being captured in space shows the Universe in all of her dazzling glory, adorned in beauty and truly unique. Who would have guessed the wonder of it all. It is the things dreams are made of, mystical, breathtaking images created from light, color and lack thereof.

Considering the turmoil down here these days, it is a call from the heavens to pause, soar, relish and refresh. Such wonder in the galaxy can only offer hope!

Jeannie

AMEN

"I walked a mile with sorrow and not a word said she, but oh the things that I did learn when Sorrow walked with me"

Once again, the circle diminishes, we close ranks for a day or two or three or four, whatever it takes, we weep, we hug, we laugh and we mourn another family loss. The losses are now closing in from parents to siblings. Life seems more fragile, emptier and infinitely less rich as the funny, warm, spirit of my eldest brother took his leave. He did not go quietly into that dark night. He fought till he could fight no more. I was with him when he stopped his labored breathing and when he took his last breath here, I prayed he was breathing deeply somewhere, for the first time in weeks, free from pain and suffering.

The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away, Blessed be the Name of the Lord. Amen

GOING ON...... four years later

Having fallen into apathetic routine was inevitable knowing my past history. Stumbling forwards and sometimes backwards through widowhood has stretched my resolve to breaking point, at times, and worse than feeling ready to break, it also brings a deep sense of apathy more often than I would like. Add to that the aging process which brings it's own threats and one can feel like one is under siege.
I don't like the sense of being a victim that creeps into my mind at regular intervals. I won't accept it. I know not from whence it comes. But, I know it stalks me. I reject it, yet the unease as it cloaks me in for a moment or two is both uncomfortable and unsettling. Although rejected it still leaves a haunting question mark in my sense of peace.
I celebrate widows everywhere who struggle as I do, to find a meaningful life in being the one left behind, the survivor. No easy task, but one filled with challenges, discoveries, tears of both joy and sorrow.
Life is but a series of letting go......and perhaps that is the biggest lesson of all.